Here we are. On the cusp of yet another year. Another chapter closed. Another full year of joyous occasions, heartbreak, new opportunities, growth, lessons learned and so much more. They are all now in the books.
2019, I am soooooo ready for you.
But as we close in on another year, I am opening a new chapter. I have turned the corner. I have made the leap (again), I am ready for a clean slate and I am ready to get down to business.
Let’s just say the past (almost) 3 years of my life have been a constant evolution. I’ve swerved (I know Michelle Obama would hate that I used that word, but I have); it’s been one hard lesson after another hard lesson after another hard lesson; its been endless tears, anger, frustrations and moments where I was always faced with trying to re-claim my identity.
The question that has haunted me: What is my identity?
Or just a lost, lost, lady?
There is nothing worse than the feeling of not knowing where you are in life, what your purpose is and where to steer the ship. I guess in retrospect, it has been a bit of a midlife crisis at the ripe ages of 39, 40 and 41…
I realize I have a lot to be grateful for in my life - an amazingly supportive, committed and loving husband, a beautiful, healthy son, a loving family, new and old friends who constantly cheer me on. But sometimes it feels like it means nothing unless I’m happy from within. And for me, that is all the above AND a career that I’m passionate about. (Selfish I know, but it’s what makes me tick).
So, I recently woke up one day and decided to give this consulting business another kick at the can. I hate that word, but essentially, it’s what I’m doing. I hated it the first time around, if I’m being really honest with myself. I hated the business development side; I hated constantly being in the ‘feast or famine’ mode (I was single and had a mortgage) and I hated the ‘sell’, always attempting to bring in new business. I also hated the fact that I didn’t have structure to my day. I didn’t have the creative output and brainstorm of a team to work with and bounce ideas off of. All of these things I missed and I realized THESE ARE WHAT MAKE ME TICK.
But I came to realize that I was my own obstacle and I could have done a lot of things differently. I could have worked harder because well, people start companies everyday that grow from 1 person to 10+ people and then some. I have friends that have done it and I’m blown away at how they have created mini-empires.
What was stopping me?
Full disclosure: ME!
I had to get out of my own way; out of that rut of not believing in myself and understand what it was I actually did for a living. Sounds odd and questionable, but there is so much power in knowing who. you. are. What you do.
I had never truly focused on one area of marketing because, truth be told, I had done it all. I needed to recalibrate, reassess and reach out to those who know me in order to get a true sense of what I bring to the table, what my strengths are in order to zone in on my true talent.
So what is that true ‘talent’? It’s still a few areas of marketing, but I’ve done a better job of perfecting my elevator pitch and focusing only on the areas I LOVE, the ones that make me TICK and the ones I have the MOST experience in.
Sounds rather simple, but you’d be shocked to know how difficult it really is to look at yourself from the inside out only to identify your flaws. It’s been three years of what I feel like is the longest therapy session of my life!
But I’m here. I’m willing and I’m determined. Clean slate.
So here goes nothing.